Slowly Then Suddenly
Ernest Hemingway said it best, "It occurs first very slowly, then all at once."
This post is 1,166 words, a 6-minute read. Enjoy!
Over the last year, I've gone from weighing consistently between 185-190 pounds to weighing 215 pounds.
How did this happen?
Slowly then suddenly.
Looking back, I can see how I got to this position. It's so many seemingly tiny decisions that on their own are small rocks, easily crushable. However, when stacked together, they become a massive 25-pound mound of fat that needs deliberate focus to change things.
It started with choosing not to do my daily 1-mile run before working out. This was typically an easy way to get my heart rate up before a workout. I hate running, so I could easily find an excuse not to do it, such as not having enough time to run during my lunch workouts. Or I would tell myself I can replace running with less rest time between sets to get the same effects as running. All excuses to get myself out of running. The thing is, by itself, this would have been fine. I had gone without running before and nothing happened.
The problem begins when it is not the only thing I changed in my health and nutrition routine. I also don't play soccer weekly as I did in the past. Sure, there are good excuses I could come up with for why I was no longer playing soccer. But in all honesty, it comes down to laziness. My soccer runs are early in the morning, and I had been going to bed late, so I was getting up too late to make it to the Saturday morning runs. But again, by itself, not playing soccer and not running is not so bad.
The buildup (builddown?) continues with my nutrition. It hit me in two ways: not eating enough of the right things throughout the day and eating too much of the wrong things at the end of the day. I stopped stocking up on the foods that I know are nutritionally dense and filling, such as salmon, broccoli, sweet potatoes, fruits, Brussels sprouts, chicken, etc. This meant that I always had a need to go buy food when hungry, and I defaulted away from staples that helped in the past, like Chipotle and went with foods like Chick-fil-A because it was cheaper and closer. I switched away from my healthier brown rice back to white rice, which is not as filling and makes me hungrier, which meant I ate even more. But again, by itself, this is not so bad because if I am working out with my normal intensity, it would not be too much of a problem. But notice things are beginning to stack up on themselves.
I mentioned this earlier. I have been going to bed later and later. Going to bed late was always something I did on certain days of the week because of my soccer ref and field managing side gig. But it went from going to bed late one or two times a week to going to bed late five to seven times a week. Here's what happened I started going to bed later and later. I get hungry when I am awake after a certain time. But I am never hungry for a bowl of salad. Nope, it is always the munchies. It is eating plantain chips or potato chips or wings or whatever fatty fast foods are easily available. Also, I no longer was stocking up on the chopped-up fruit salads that satiated me whenever I worked late.
Why did I go into detail discussing the things that I believe played a role in my 25-pound weight gain? Because I want you to notice the thing that I did not say I stopped doing.
I was still going to the gym. I was still working out. I may have switched it up a bit and let some things go, but I was still doing the "right" thing.
I believe this is how we all end up in situations that we never expected we would be in or return to. It is not unique to only our fitness. It is also in our faith walk, our finances, our relationships, and so many other things.
In our finances, it can play out like this:
We find a way to increase our income. Then slowly increase our spending as we get comfortable with the new income. Then over time, we begin to reduce our focus on our finances because we got that good bread now, so it is easy to get away with financial mistakes. We start skipping our monthly spending review and monthly spending plan. However, we still generally know when money is coming in and out of our account. We just no longer have an acute sense of our finances.
Then we start adding a variety of subscriptions to our monthly spending. On its own, it ain't that bad. I mean, adding Disney+ and HBO Max when we have Netflix ain't that big of a deal. However, we tend to combine tiny changes with bigger life changes. We moved to a more expensive apartment, which is a good thing. But remember, we are no longer reviewing our monthly spending.
For some of us, the higher incomes come with an internal obligation and/or desire to support our friends and family. We try to show up for everyone and for everything to make up for the times we could not. On its own, this is not bad. It is a great thing to use our blessings to bless others. But remember, now things are beginning to stack up.
Then throw in all the trips we can finally go on that we were never able to go on. The birthday celebrations, the random brunches, the random nightlife activities, the random sporting events, the eating out, and other life celebrations that just "come up."
Then one day, we wake up and we feel stressed over money. We ask ourselves, "How did I end up here? I thought things were going well and I had been doing all the things that I needed to do." The answer is
Slowly then suddenly.
Very few things in our lives happen drastically. Most things are like erosion; it happens slowly over time and then all at once. The question we have to ask ourselves is,
"WHAT ARE THE POINTS OF EROSION IN MY LIFE?"
Because the good news is, good things also happen in the same way.
Slowly then suddenly.
By implementing the things, I know I ought to do consistently and then learning new things, I will slowly move toward my goal. The easiest thing for me to implement is going to sleep on time and replacing the snacks in my house with fruits. I will continue working out consistently and add my running back into the mix.
It happens on both sides. Bad things happen slowly, then suddenly.
Good things also happen slowly, then suddenly.
And Remember Generosity>greed
God Bless you
✌🏾
Recommendation Section
Nick Maggiulli in The Things You Can't Buy, writes about all the ways we chase after money but miss out on the most important things in life. He also makes an awesome announcement.
Johnathan Clements in Advice For The Kids, gives some of the best financial advice for us youngins in bite-sized form that I've ever seen
Morgan Housel in A Few Little Ideas And Short Stories. Provides awesome stories to help us understand the world and think better.
There are hidden costs in almost everything we choose to purchase. Doug and Heather Boneparth have a series covering many of them. The latest topic is on Holidays
A new podcast I am loving is called 50Fires. It is by Carl Richards, a recovering Financial Planner and Advisor. He could help other people with their finances but had a difficult time talking about money with his wife and children. It has quickly become one of my most anticipated podcasts to listen to every week.